[12:26 a.m.] : [2005-04-19]
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so there was no oversized twister mat making. sarah made the mat all by herself before coming over so we had to simply watch High Fidelity and cuddle. I think we where able to salvage that situation. was i too harsh earlier? you know with that last entry, was it a bit much? i don't know, it's late and i'm tired and just had a really nice evening and everything and i'm wondering if it was a bit much. i think it might have been. not that i am trying to make excuses, obviously i felt it at the time. but seriously, i like where i am at, yes it sucks for her that it does not involve her. but i was unhappy where that was and i told her as much. i tried the friends thing and that didn't work either. there always comes a time to walk away. and that time passed so long ago. i just want to be clear it's not like something better came along and stole my attention. the attention was gone for a while now and i haven't even been looking. but something just showed up anyway and played my guitar and opened me up to new ideas. things like letting myself be happy. and that especially is something i will not appologize for. i can't. and why should i? it's like jimmy says "if i can't let myself be happy now, then when? if not now, when." |
