[1:09 a.m.] : [2016-01-02]
|
and to let you know I think of you from time to time. Dear Beth, I had a dream of you last night. I saw you in a club. I was at the bar with a friend and saw you with a group across the room. I wanted to say hello, but... It was an open mic/karaoke night so I got up on stage an played a song I had written for you years ago when we were together, when we were still talking.I woke up from that dream wanting to write you this letter. I wrote it in my head and lay in bed wondering if I'd actually write it at all and if I'd bother sending it to you if I did. The weird thing about the dream though, when we had been together I never did write any songs for you. Still, in the dream I had and it felt right. Sometimes I wish we had been able to be friends. I hope you are well. Okay, I will go back to leaving you alone forever now.
but somehow I miss you and wish that you'd stayed in my life.
Making contact gets harder as the silence grows longer.
I'm under no illusion as to what I meant to you.
Dear Ashtray, I had a dream of you last night. I was in a room in a house packing for a move. As I was putting the final items into a bag the doorbell rang. I was so close to being finished I couldn't be bothered with the door and someone else answered it but yelled that it was for me. I got up from what I was doing, exited the room, and from the landing at the top of the stairs where I stood I could see waiting on the floor below you sat in a chair. I stopped and you looked up at me. For half a second that felt like forever I felt frozen in your headlights but you smiled up at me and said, "Hey." I didn't know what you wanted and I guess my subconscious knows how little I care because in response all I said was, "Oh FUCK OFF," and I turned, went back to the room I had been packing and slammed the door.
Now and then I stumble on what I've misplaced but never lost, I'm under no illusion as to what I meant to you... sometimes I still feel the bruise.
|
